its Your life.

Mon, 09 Jul 2007 20:11:14 GMT

yesterday was one of my favorite days ever.
and not really even because of my baptism
but because of hearing this missionary from Mexico who spoke in my dad's Sunday school class.

she started off her... speech or whatever by saying that we all sing the song "yes, Lord, yes, Lord, yes yes Lord, amen.... i'm trading my sorrows, i'm trading my shame, i'm laying them down for the joy of the Lord"
but then she questioned us: do we really know what it means to say "yes" to the Lord?
she mentioned how the disciples were saddened but they were still always rejoicing- the TRUE joy of the Lord is experienced in suffering.
would we still say "yes" if there wasn't any trading?

let me back up a minute. i need to tell you a little bit about Gloria.
her full name is Gloria Sloan and she's from El Salvador. she felt God was calling her to be a cross-cultural missionary when she was in her teens and when she finished school, she felt God wanted her to go to the United States.
so she goes, meets this guy, Gary, and right off the bat she knew they would get married. since they were both called into the missionfield, they decided to start fulfilling their requirements to get on the IMB (International Missions Board). It took them 10 years but they'd begun a family in the process. so when they finally completed everything, they felt the Lord was leading them to Mexico. so they arrive in Mexico and Gary tells Sloan how excited he is that they're finally, after all this time, getting to do what God's called them to do!
six months later, its their oldest daughter's 11th birthday so they throw a party on the beach. that day, the undertoe was extremely bad and when Gary, Gloria's husband, realized their eldest daughter was drowning, he jumped in to save her and two other summer intern missionaries jumped in, too. all four died that day and Gloria was left standing bewildered on the beach with her three other children.
never in her wildest dreams did she imagine God would use her family's immense pain and suffering to minister to others.
she didn't tell us this, but my dad knew because he's spoken with her through emails, but the moment they found all the bodies and had them lying on the beach, the people nearby gathered. and even though she was weeping and confused she told everyone on the beach that had come to see what was going on that God was sovereign and that He had a plan and that He was going to use her husband and daughter's deaths to give Him glory. only hours after they had died, she began to witness to those around her about Christ's unfailing love.
if that doesn't floor you, i don't know what will.

[[[this next part i'm going to tell as if i'm her talking because i don't know how to word it any differently... if that makes sense]]]
" one night, as i was leaving the house that belonged to a family i knew, the father, Margarito walked me to the door and quietly said "Hermana Gloria, i know you may not want to hear this, but if your husband and daughter would not have died, my family would not have heard about the Gospel." and i thought to myself "if only you knew that if i was given a choice, i would've chosen my family over yours" but after awhile i realized that that was a glance into the heart of God and His love for these people. i am truly humbled and honored ot be a part of such a plan to reach these beloved ones of my Father. i don't know God's future plans for me. will He allow me to marry again? will i serve Him better single or married? i don't know, but that is not my greatest concern. the desire of my heart is to bring Him glory and to do the job He has entrusted me to do as faithfully as i can. "

she really stressed a point about how we all want to wear the crown that the sons and daughters of the King get to wear.
she then recited the lyrics to a song written by The Martins (a gospel group):
"there's not a victory without a fight
there's not a sunrise without a night
there's not a purchase without a cost
there's not a crown without a cross."

were's so willing to wear the crown, but are we really willing to carry the cross?
even if it means at the extent of the death of your family members?

anyways.
i need to go so i have to wrap this up.

i went up to her afterwords to tell her that her story meant alot to me
because i had recently (at camp) given God all of my dreams, all my preferences, including my desire to marry and have kids.
whenever i told her this i began to cry.
and not the cute girly crying but i was weeping.
before i knew it, i was leaning my head against her shoulder, just bawling my eyes out
and she was holding me.
and... i can't explain it but it was like... i've known her my whole life.
i managed to utter out some more things and when i looked up at her i realized that the tears in her eyes matched mine. and she told me that just because God had accepted her willingness to give up everything and anything she had to the Lord, didn't necessarily mean that God would never allow me to marry, but that it was good that i had already come to the point where i'd be able to say "even if it means this, even if it means this AND this, i will still serve You".
i don't know.
i really can't explain it but
i really do feel like i've known her forever.
she was so sweet and peaceful.

i'll update more on other things later because my dad wants me to get off the computer.

"for the praise of His glory we are called, not for our convenience." --Gloria Sloan

YFN 2007 Uproar

Wed, 04 Jul 2007 16:12:59 GMT

read the entry after this before you watch the video!

oh and, note:
probably the coolest/most amazing thing that happened at Youth For the Nations occurs at the 4 minute mark.
watch carefully.
and maybe i'll tell you about it one day.

i think i'm looking for something you know

Sun, 15 Jan 2006 23:56:06 GMT

Sought After

its Your life.

YFN 2007 Uproar

i think i'm looking for something you know